Autoethnography Project

Hi Guys! Welcome back to the final blog post of this semester! Below, I have posted my Autoethnography Project. I hope you enjoy!

The Effect of COVID-19 on Healthcare Workers

Introduction

COVID-19 is a specific type of Coronavirus that emerged in Wuhan, China in December of 2019. The disease is a virus that attacks the respiratory system and is highly fatal. The disease is new and treatments are difficult as doctors do not understand the virus yet. The disease began to spread exponentially with China and quickly overwhelmed the healthcare system. Too many were sick to treat, forcing ill people to die at home without treatment. In January, the disease began to spread outside of China. COVID-19 cases arose in India, Philippines, Russia, Spain, Sweden, the United Kingdom, Australia, Canada, Germany, Japan, Singapore, the US, the UAE and Vietnam within a few days (Muccari, 2020). COVID-19 reached America, and by March most of the nation was put on Stay-at-home orders. Everything except essential businesses were shut down (Muccari, 2020). Healthcare workers are needed now more than ever, but the risk of going to work is also much higher.

COVID-19 has had an effect on everyone within the United States. Many states are adhering to strict stay-at-home orders and the entire nation is encouraged to abide by social distancing. Businesses deemed non-essential are all shut down and the date for reopening is very unclear. Schools have all been changed to virtual learning. Everyone has been affected; however, there is a community that lives have largely changed during this time. The healthcare workers are facing exposure to this virus at work. 

As an Emergency Room and Trauma EMT, I work in the hot zone. My work life has changed tremendously since the beginning of COVID-19. I am exposed to COVID-19 patients. I have seen cases ranging from very mild to incredibly severe. I have been with patients as they succumb to the virus. All of the emergency room staff has had to adjust to this new normal. Being in this environment, I am seeing the changes in people’s lives around me. I wanted to further investigate the changes that healthcare workers are facing in their lives due to this pandemic. 

This autoethnography investigates how different healthcare workers on the frontline are being affected. I will investigate how their daily lives, work lives, and how other people view them has changed. I have formatted my autoethnography to investigate the following driving questions.

1. What emotions do I feel going to work now versus prior to the COVID 19 pandemic?
2. How has work changed for me?
3. How has my daily life been affected?
4. Am I a hero?

Methodology

In order to investigate the effect of COVID-19 on healthcare workers, I began by conducting both primary and secondary research. I will be sharing the information of my own narrative, along with others. I chose to interview three healthcare workers, Dylan Augenstein, Nayiri Alexander, and a coworker. These are all healthcare workers with very different experiences and responsibilities outside of work. I wanted to see how their perspectives may vary, even though they share a common career. I also chose to interview my mother, a non-healthcare worker, in order to get an outsider’s perspective on how healthcare worker’s lives are being affected. 

Primary Research

My Narrative

I am currently a sophomore, studying biology and chemistry at Chapman University. I am a pre-med student. I live in Orange County with my two moms and brother. COVID-19 has had a large impact on my life. On March 11th, Chapman was moved to online learning. My seven classes and multiple labs would now be done within the confines of my own room. We did not know what was in store for us regarding COVID. Would we soon turn into the next New York? Would I be forced to work every single night, as my hospital is overwhelmed with COVID patients? I used to stroll through the emergency room, maskless, and even with my hair down sometimes. I took precautions, but we were all pretty relaxed. We soon started wearing tight n95 masks, a surgical mask over that, a face shield, and a surgical hair cap. However, masks were running short so we had to rewear them shift after shift. This is a common problem in hospitals in the US. The FDA has confirmed a global shortage of personal protective equipment. Healthcare workers are forced to re-wear single-use PPE, making it less safe for the patient and healthcare worker (FDA, 2020). 

• What emotions do I feel going to work now versus prior to the COVID 19 pandemic? How has work changed for me?

Prior to going to COVID-19, I had become very accustomed to the environment of the emergency room. I have worked there for nearly two years. I know what is expected of me and I feel prepared for what happens. This changed for me when the pandemic began. We now had to question every patient who walked into the emergency room. Have they traveled? Do they have respiratory symptoms? The whole emergency room’s aura had changed. I have never been fearful of my job. I still am not fearful for myself, but I have developed a new fear. I fear that I will spread the virus to my family. I risk exposure to many different illnesses at work. I have been exposed to MRSA, C-DIFF, tuberculosis, among others. I signed up for that as a healthcare worker. However, my family did not sign up to be exposed to a potentially lethal disease. I would never be able to live with the guilt of getting my parents sick. I have a specific instance where I felt the change in emotions regarding exposure at work. 

I was recently majorly exposed to COVID because I was in the room with a patient and was not properly equipped with PPE. I was with one other person in the room when the patient’s heart stopped and I began on CPR while the other person began to ventilate him. These are two of the most dangerous positions to be in with a COVID patient because CPR and ventilation aerosolized the virus. While we were doing this, the people outside of the room were getting their proper gear on in order to come in. I could have left the room. No one would have judged me for it. This was never a consideration we would have made in the past. Deciding whether to run into the room of a person who is quite literally dying, is something new to all of us. However, that never is something that could cross my mind. Those minutes it took for other people to come in were minutes that his heart was still circulating blood and I would never value my own self over him. For the days after this exposure, I felt like the most selfish person in the world because I could have brought it home to my family. I value someone else’s safety over my own, but I am not the only one to consider. We are putting ourselves and our own families at by going to work. Now, a selfless act can feel quite selfish now. 

• How has my daily life been affected?

My daily life looks a lot different now. I used to go to school five days a week. I was sometimes until past midnight. I spent time in office hours, with friends studying, at nearby restaurants. The pre-med course load is not an easy one and can be quite overwhelming. I am now doing it within the confines of my bedroom. I no longer can hug my family and try to social distance within my own home. I try to stay away from my family inside of the house, which is hard because I am so close to them. Inside of work, the public has been very kind to us. People bring food and gifts to the emergency room staff. I have noticed that I am thanked at work much more often. Outside of work, my family calls me a hero. They worry about my safety, but have a lot of respect for me. 

• Am I a hero?

This question interested me because of the public’s response to healthcare workers during this time. Everyone is calling us heroes, but I wanted to see if healthcare workers viewed themselves in the same light. For me, I do not. I still see myself as the same person I always have been. Going to work is not heroic for me. I signed up to be a healthcare worker and this is a time that healthcare workers are needed more than ever. 

Interview with Dylan Augenstein

Dylan is my brother who is also a paramedic. He works as a paramedic in both Riverside and Orange County. He is 23 years old. 

• What emotions do I feel going to work now versus prior to the COVID 19 pandemic?

“I don’t really feel different going to work. I am just fearful that I will get my parents sick. They are all that really comes to my mind when I worry.”

• How has my daily life been affected?

“People outside of work call me a hero. They say that I am risking my life and tell me how thankful they are for me. When I am at work it is very different. Everyone sees me as dirty. I have been denied the use of restrooms in restaurants, at gas stations, even at hospitals. On a twelve-hour shift, I once didn’t get to use the restroom. Before this, people never did this. People treated us well and appreciated us. Now, they call us heroes, but don’t want us anywhere near them.”

• Am I a hero?

“Hahaha, no definitely not. I just go to work and do my job. Nothing heroic about it.”

Interview with Nayiri Alexander

Nayiri Alexander is a sophomore at Chapman University studying biology and chemistry. She is a pre-med student. She also works as an ER and Trauma EMT in Orange County. 

• What emotions do I feel going to work now versus prior to the COVID 19 pandemic?

“I don’t really feel any different emotions about going to work than I did before when it pertains to myself. I just worry that my family will get sick and it will be all my fault. My parents initially wanted me to stop working. They thought it was too dangerous. But I could never. This is what I signed up for.”

• How has work changed for me?

“Everything feels like it has changed at work. All of a sudden we are suspicious of every patient and nearly everyone is a COVID rule out. It just seems like overnight everything changed. I do feel like everyone at work is more of a family now.”

• How has my daily life been affected?

“Overnight, everything was locked down. School was shut down and now I am stuck doing seven classes all by myself. I lost the support of classmates and professors for interpersonal interactions. I am still expected to maintain perfect grades, even though nothing is normal. There is more support from the public. People bring us food and make signs. Outside of work, my family has been supportive. I have received many loving messages of thanks. However, I have noticed that my family and others do not want to be around me during this time. They think I am a carrier and are scared of me.”

• Am I a hero?

Nayriri began by laughing at this question. “No, no, I don’t think so. Hero? No. I think that people view us as heroes because we are running towards the center of danger, not away from it. This is a heroic quality. But I still see it as going to do the job that I signed up for.”

Interview with Coworker

My coworker chose to stay anonymous for this interview. She works with me as an ER and Trauma Tech. She is currently not in school, so her life looks different than mine or Nayiri’s. 

• What emotions do I feel going to work now versus prior to the COVID 19 pandemic?

“My emotions for work haven’t really changed. I am just now more cautious. My mother has a cardiac history, so I worry about her getting ill.”

• How has my daily life been affected?

“I now am practicing self-isolation. I do not leave my room until my family has gone to bed or before they get up in the morning. Even though I still live at home, I am confining myself to my bedroom in order to not expose my family. This is a very lonely existence.”

• Am I a hero?

“This is a very interesting question. My answer has to be no, but I understand why someone would say yes. I understand why the public would say yes. I think that people performing heroic acts do not go about them with the mindset of being a hero.”

Interview with Sondra Piorek

Sondra Piorek is my mother. She was able to give an outsider’s perspective of how she sees her healthcare worker son and daughter’s lives being changed. 

• How do you feel about your kids working in medicine during this time?

“As a mother, I am very worried. I do not want anything to happen to either of my kids. They are my world. I love them and am so proud of them.”

• How do you think work has changed for healthcare workers during this time?

“I can speak for what I see my kids going through. I see photos of Makena at work, wearing multiple masks and face shields. She comes home with her nose bleeding from skin irritation and constant headaches because her mask doesn’t allow her to breathe well.”

• Are healthcare workers heroes?

“Absolutely. My kids are my absolute heroes. They are young, in their 20’s, risking their lives to help other people. They are not doctors with huge paychecks. They are doing this because they truly believe in helping people. My son is a tiny box of an ambulance breathing the same air as COVID patients. Makena is performing CPR on COVID patients, sometimes unequipped, and doesn’t think a thing of it. She has wounds on her face from her mask. Healthcare workers are all heroes.”

Analysis 

There were many interesting points that were made in my investigation. I have found three main conclusions that were most interesting. A common thought that appeared in every interview was the response to the question about emotions regarding going to work. All healthcare workers answered that they were not scared to go to work, but scared to bring the disease home to their families. It appears that healthcare workers are used to being exposed to different illnesses, but the guilt of bringing one of these diseases home is too much to bear. In this time where people are referring to going to work as heroic, it seems that healthcare workers are actually feeling guilty. Going to work is a selfless act during this time, but feels selfish as well. We are all taking extra precautions to stay away from our families, which is a difficulty that we are all having to adjust to. After a hard night’s work it can be very comforting to hug a family member, but we are not getting to do that during this time. 

I was also interested in the difference in how hospital healthcare workers versus pre-hospital workers are being treated now. Nayiri, my coworker, and I have all had positive experiences with the public at work. We are brought food and gifts. People make signs and hang them outside. However, Dylan, who works in the prehospital setting has been treated much worse. Paramedics are front-line workers that people refer to as heroes, yet they are being treated terribly. There is a divide in how we are treating people. People in the hospital are being treated as heroes by the public, but pre-hospital workers, who are equally deserving of the title “Hero” are not. There is a discrepancy in how we are treating different front-line workers. 

My most interesting finding was in response to “Am I a hero.” Nayiri, my brother, and my coworker all answered no. We do not feel like heroes. We can recognize heroic qualities, but our job still feels like the same job we have always had. There are some changes to what works like, but it still is the same job. They mentioned that this is their duty. However, my mom, a non-healthcare worker, was quick to exclaim yes. To her, all healthcare workers are absolutely heroes. I find it interesting that the healthcare workers themselves cannot recognize their own heroics, but other people can thoroughly explain exactly why they believe healthcare workers are heroes. Although I do not know the exact cause of this, I believe it has to do with people’s inability to acknowledge their own triumphs. People tend to downplay their successes and I think that healthcare workers just look at their job as normal. They do not see the heroism in it, but it is great to see how the public’s perspective is different than this. 

Conclusion

Healthcare workers during COVID-19 are all being affected in different and similar ways. It is true that all healthcare workers are at an increased risk of exposure. Patient care requires close contact with other people and being around COVID patients risks the provider’s health as well. Shortages of PPE make this risk even higher. Not only do healthcare workers put themselves at risk, but also their families. Exposure to them may mean exposure to their mother, father, child, etc. Although there is an increased risk, it appears that healthcare workers have not considered backing down. They are continuing to go into work, even though they are sacrificing time away from school and family. Healthcare workers are socially isolating in their own homes, continuing their education, all while fighting a pandemic.